X-Factor Analysis And Predictions

Sixth Week: Lady Gaga and Queen Night


Ok, there's no real need to beat around the bush this week.  X-Factor UK is in a crisis.  The past few weeks have not been great, but we only have the public to blame as good acts like Sophie Habibis and The Risk have now gone whilst idiots like Frankie stayed in.

Well, the wannabe young Russell Brand is no longer in the show having been kicked out for boasting about taking drugs.  My guess is that he probably doesn't even care and is somewhere right this moment trying to get his leg over an impressionable 17 year old girl.

But back to the music, or what is left of it.  After a few days of debating amongst themselves as to what they should do, X-Factor producers and PR men thought that they would give the "great British public" a chance to redeem themselves and vote back in one of the acts that got voted out after Week One.  This meant that Amelia Lilly (the Christina Aguilera lookalike) , Jonjo Kerr (the singing soldier), 2 Shoes (the Essex girls)  or James Michael (even I don't remember him).

Are you still with me?  I am not sure I even am, but here is the analysis and predictions from last night.

X-Factor Analysis And Predictions

Fourth Week: Halloween 


It has been a tumultuous week to say the least for the UK's X-Factor. First we had the news that Kelly Rowland had had to pull out of this week's show due to "illness", which some people have translated Kelly throwing a tantrum after Tulisa attempted to bully Misha B by calling her....a bully.  This brought The Urbanite with the first bit if bad news for the week, because not only did it mean that we were deprived of Kelly's beautiful face for the night, but it also meant we had to put up with that burke, Alexandra Burke, for the whole night.

Next, that guy out of The Risk that no-one really notices decided that he didn't want to be spend the rest of his life being "that guy from The Risk that no-one really notices" - and jumped ship, leaving the other three band members stunned.  Well, The Urbanite can reveal that the X-Factor producers navigated themselves through that conundrum doing what they do best - going to another group, this time Nu Vibe, and stealing their best singer.  So now, Ashford from Nu Vibe is the newest member of The Risk.

And lastly, in other news, Rhythmix were forced to change their name to Little Mix due to a dispute with a well-established charity that goes by the same name.

All this must have caused a headache for the UK X-Factor PR team, who are already struggling with the realisation that US X-Factor is already ten times better, even though it is in its first year.

Anyway, Halloween night went ahead, and here is The Urbanite's analysis and predictions.